Mary Oliver’s lyric poem “When Death Comes” was originally published in 1991 in the Virginia Quarterly Review when she was in her fifties. It was published well after Oliver had established her career and a little over a decade after she had received the Pulitzer Prize for American Primitive (1984). The poem was later included in New and Selected Poems, Volume One, a collection that won the National Book Award in 1992.

The poem is typical of Oliver’s poems as it deals with the existential topics of life and death by using imagery from nature, particularly references to New England. The poem has been anthologized numerous and remains popular with the public. Its antepenultimate stanza, the third from the last, and its lines, “When it’s over, I want to say all my life / I was a bride married to amazement” (Lines 21-22) are often quoted during memorials and in overviews of Oliver and her work.

Content warning: This guide briefly addresses information about the poet’s childhood, which includes mention of sexual abuse.

Poet Biography

Mary Jane Oliver was born to Edward William Oliver, a teacher, and Helen Vlasak-Oliver, a secretary, on September 10, 1935, in Maple Heights, Ohio, outside of Cleveland. In interviews, Oliver noted that her childhood was “dysfunctional” and that she was a survivor of sexual abuse (See: Further Reading & Resources). To escape the tension in her household, she often took long walks in the woods nearby and wrote poetry about what she saw, a habit she would keep throughout her life.

At the age of 17, Oliver left Ohio for Austerlitz, New York, where she spent six years helping the sister of Edna St. Vincent Millay organize Millay’s papers. Although Oliver studied at both Ohio State University and at Vassar College, she did not complete a degree. In the late 1950s, she met photographer Mary Malone Cook, who would become her companion for the next 40 years.

With Cook, Oliver settled in Provincetown, Massachusetts, where the landscape provided impetus for her work. In 1963, Oliver published her first collection, No Voyage and Other Poems. In 1969, she received the Shelley Memorial Award from the Poetry Society of America. The River Styx, Ohio, and Other Poems was published in 1972, The Night Traveler in 1978, and Twelve Moons appeared in 1979. These collections deal with the topics of birth, death, memory, and myth.

In 1980, Oliver received a Guggenheim Foundation Fellowship. Four years later, she published American Primitive which won the Pulitzer Prize. This was followed by Dream Work in 1986. In the 1990s, she published several volumes of poetry, including House of Light (1990), New and Selected Poems, Volume One (1992), White Pine (1994), West Wind: Poems and Prose Poems (1997), and Winter Hours: Prose, Prose Poems, and Poems (1999). Throughout the 1980s and 1990s, Oliver taught intermittently at Case Western Reserve University, Bucknell University, Sweet Briar College, and Bennington College. In 1994, she published The Poetry Handbook, a craft book designed to help aspiring poets.

In the final 17 years of her life, Oliver remained prolific, publishing a collection of poetry nearly every year. These include: The Leaf and the Cloud (2000); What Do We Know (2002); Owls and Other Fantasies (2003); Why I Wake Early (2004); Blue Iris (2004); Wild Geese: Selected Poems (2004); New and Selected Poems, Volume 2 (2005); Thirst (2006); Red Bird (2008); The Truro Bear and Other Adventures (2008); Evidence (2009); Swan (2010); A Thousand Mornings (2012); Dog Songs (2013); Blue Horses (2014); and Felicity (2015). Oliver’s last work was Devotions: The Selected Poems (2017).

Cook passed away in 2005, and Oliver moved to Hobe Sound, Florida in 2014. She lived there until her death from cancer on January 17, 2019. Before her passing, Oliver was given honorary doctorates from The Art Institute of Boston, Tufts University, Marquette University, and Dartmouth College. She remains a widely read and beloved poet.

Poem Text

Oliver, Mary. “When Death Comes.” 1991. Library of Congress.

Summary

The speaker begins this lyric poem discussing how they will eventually be greeted by death. They speculate that death might come as a “hungry bear” (Line 2), from illness, or similar to “an iceberg” (Line 8). The speaker hopes, however, that when the time of their death does arrive, they will greet the moment with inquisitive wonder, another experience to explore, rather than with dread or in despair. They compare the afterlife to a “cottage” (Line 10) they will go into with “curiosity” (Line 9). In the meantime, they hope to fully engage with the living world, to “look upon everything” (Line 11) and everyone with a sense of kindness, understanding, and camaraderie. The speaker recognizes that each person—like a “flower” (Line 15)—is familiar yet unique. Each life is worthwhile, a song that deserves to be sung until it is done; every individual’s physical journey requires bravery. When the inevitable end of the speaker’s life happens, they want to feel they have lived their life fully engaged, loving each experience in the same way that newlyweds love each other. In this way, the speaker believes their life will have value and they will have few regrets.