The “Before” Nora is outgoing and enjoys hanging out with her friend Danielle at the pool, talking about “boys and books and movies and makeup” (227). Nora’s long hair is highlighted by “chlorine and sun and adventure” (15). She shares her outdoorsy parents’ love of the desert, even though she won’t admit to them that she’s afraid of heights. Mom and Dad passed on to Nora their extensive knowledge of desert life and survival. She deeply loves her parents and, until the traumatic event that changes her life, feels secure in her happy family, growing up in “a time / of safety, love, and adventure” (114). Nora enjoys writing and keeps a notebook of her poetry.

Following the shooting that takes Mom’s life and injures Dad, the “After” Nora struggles with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). She has nightmares and panic attacks. She fears dying and is alternately hyper-cautious about her life and ambivalent about its worth. Nora feels guilt for Mom’s death, shame that she hid and survived, and rage and hate for the shooter. She uses these emotions to build an emotional wall to protect her from further pain. Nora feels powerless and searches for answers to Mom’s death.