Not in the Heart

Christian radio personality Chris Fabry’s third novel, Not in the Heart (2012), is about the transformation of a selfish gambling addict who has abandoned his family. Given one last chance to redeem himself by securing a heart donation for his dying son, the wry and sarcastic anti-hero finds a modicum of faith and recovery. Winning the Christy Award for fiction about the role of faith in contemporary life, the book has been praised by readers for the ways it pushes the tropes of Christian novels through its unpredictable plot, the interesting moral quandaries at its center, and the jaundiced worldview of its protagonist.

Our protagonist is Truman Wiley, who at one point in his life was a stellar success both professionally and personally. Truman was a journalist whose reportage from around the world won accolades. At home, he and his wife Ellen were raising feisty firebrand Abigail and her younger brother, Aidan, who was battling a congenital heart condition.

The stress of Aidan’s illness took its toll on the family. Ellen coped by becoming more religious and joining a Bible study group where she found support. But for Truman, the stress of not knowing whether a medical crisis would befall Aidan on any given day, combined with the continually dashed hopes of the organ transplant list, becomes too much. He resents Ellen for finding some measure of peace in the church and suspects the men there of wanting to sleep with her. Always a fan of gambling, Truman turns to the casino to self-soothe and quickly becomes a problem gambler. Eventually, this habit costs him his job, estranges him from his family, and puts him in hock to a scary loan shark who wants to collect.



When the novel opens, Truman’s self-loathing has reached a critical pitch. Hiding out in a seaside cabin, he avoids thinking about how much he has let down his wife and children—not only has he left Ellen to single-handedly care for Abby and Aiden, but he also hasn’t even been able to provide for them financially. He loves them deeply, but this actually fuels his abandonment—he believes they are better off without him.

In Truman’s absence, Ellen has had to become almost superhuman. So far, she has managed to be Aiden’s sole caregiver and someone for Abby to lean on. However, soon this stops being enough—Aiden is hospitalized and if a donor heart isn’t found soon for the declining 18-year-old, he will die.

Ellen confides her despair in her Bible group, where a woman named Oleta befriends her. Like Ellen, Oleta is also estranged from her husband, Terrell Conley, who is on death row for the murder of a young woman named Diana. Throughout his 30 years in prison awaiting his execution, Terrell has always proclaimed his innocence. At the same time, he has used his incarceration to embrace Christianity. Now, because he is scheduled to be killed soon anyway, Terrell would instead like to donate his heart to Aiden. For Terrell, the discovery that he is a perfect match to be an organ donor for the boy proves God’s will at work. The only thing Oleta would like in return is for Ellen’s famous husband to report out the story of this donation and of Terrell’s reformation from drunken ne’er-do-well to man of God as a memorial to Terrell.



Ellen calls Truman out of his self-imposed exile to ask him to write about Terrell’s gift. Not only will it allow their son to get an organ transplant, but Oleta will even pay Truman $15,000 for the work—money the Wileys can use for their medical bills.

Truman returns to some semblance of his old life. He does his best to reconnect with his family, bearing the righteous rage of his daughter, trying to redress the disappointed love of his wife, and connecting with his dying son. But it takes a long time for Truman to put aside his demons. At first, he quickly backslides, gambling away the $15,000 as soon as he gets it, instead of paying off Aiden’s hospital fees. Abigail finds him and agrees to help him write the story. One hopeful revelation is Abby’s own talent for writing, something she can use to help Truman with his story and something he can be proud of giving her.

Truman investigates Terrell’s life, the murder of Diana, the trial, and Terrell’s claims of innocence. It’s true that Terrell was a blackout drunk who happened to be out begging for drink money the night that Diana was killed, but the haste with which the trial was conducted and the speed of the conviction make Truman suspicious. Pinning the murder on someone with a history of losing memory during alcoholic benders is an easy way to avoid the real perpetrator if that happens to be someone with connections or power.



Realizing that Terrell might well be as innocent as he claims, Truman faces a profound and seemingly unsolvable dilemma. If he pursues his investigation, he might free a wrongfully convicted man. But if he gets Terrell’s sentence dismissed, what will happen to Aiden? Which is more important—justice or the life of his son?

Terrell seems resigned to his fate. He has so deeply accepted Christ that he welcomes the chance to be up close and personal with his creator as soon as possible. He asks Truman to stop digging for the truth and just accept the gift of a heart. But Truman can’t put aside his old journalistic instincts. Eventually, his detective work reveals the real killer: a powerful politician. When cornered, the evil man shoots Truman in a bid to escape, a scene that reveals the meaning of the novel’s title. Truman begs to be shot “not in the heart”—he has decided to donate his own heart to Aiden. Truman accepts his death, knowing that the evidence he has found will free Terrell and convict the politician. But most of all, he dies knowing he has finally taken care of his family by allowing his son to live.