When her mother’s assistant called at 5:30 on the morning of July 12, 2020, Riley immediately knew something was wrong. Her brother had shot himself. Before she could truly absorb the enormity of this tragic news, Riley and her husband were driving to wake Lisa. Riley knew the news would kill her mother; she “couldn’t imagine her living without [Ben]” (241). They left the twins with a nanny and rushed to the house. On the way, Riley called her father, who immediately caught a plane to LA. The house where Ben had died was already barricaded and surrounded by police cars. The officers wouldn’t let them into Ben’s room, so they waited in Lisa’s room, where Riley and her mother lay together on the floor. Finally, the police officers agreed to divert from protocol and let the family see Ben’s body. Riley describes his face as “perfectly intact” and “beautiful” (244). Her mother became hysterical, holding her son’s head and spreading blood everywhere. Riley was in shock as she watched the coroner’s van take her brother’s body away.

Danny moved into Lisa’s new house with Riley, her husband, and the twins. Lockdown for COVID-19 had recently begun, and the family was isolated in both their grief and fear of the new virus.